Owning mistakes: How Leaders grow by admitting they were wrong

"Welcome, I'm a human, and I'm gonna make mistakes. But I will always act in the Team's best interests. Those will not necessarily be your best interests, or mine." Doc Rivers (NBA All-Star and one of the greatest coaches in NBA History) on Netflix Coaches Playbook

An inability to own one's mistakes is a significant contributor to losing the trust and effort in a team. Leaders who are unable to admit they made a wrong call risk alienating their team and sapping morale. A continued trend of not taking ownership, blaming others or just unilaterally revising the narrative to suit the leader will drive people to leave.

The Buck never stops

Leaders worry about being wrong. There is still a "buck stops with me" attitude that allows for no mistakes. Humans are very versatile mistake makers. We are wrong approximately as often as we are right. Some leaders, especially new leaders, feel that their authority rests on making perfect decisions and fight hard to maintain an air of authority by avoiding mistakes. Not only is this exhausting for the leader, but it also limits decision range and makes it difficult for the leader to accept blame when things inevitably go wrong. The team can see this failure to accept blame as a warning, and in response, they fail to commit fully to even the good ideas.

Leaders have a duty to put the mission first

The company's best interests outweigh their own. They need to be authentic in their belief and should utilise their knowledge, experience, and understanding to make informed decisions based on the best available evidence at the time, thereby moving the company closer to its vision. This "right at the time, for the right reasons” attitude is the best way a leader can make the important calls. It's an attitude which allows for leeway and mistakes but which is still incredibly authentic.

In Poker, correct play is everything. Poker, like leadership, is a high-variance game. Part of its appeal is that element of luck, which means an amateur can beat a pro. Good players win more than they lose despite this variance. They do so because a key rule in playing good Poker is to get one's money in to the pot whilst you are ahead and have odds in your favour. The turn of the cards after that matters little. Play the hand correctly according to the situation, and you will end up (over time) a winning player. It is much the same in leadership.

Leaders are there to make clear decisions

They are trusted to be the best person within the business to make those decisions, with a high probability of getting them correct most of the time. Leaders sometimes fail by making the wrong decision, but because the wrong decision is very hard actually to quantify (there are no crystal balls), leaders are far more likely to fail through not making clear decisions and, therefore, losing the support of the team.

Failing to make decisions is a significant weakness in a leader. Much more so than the wrong decisions, so why do so many leaders fear apologising when a big call that they made plays out badly?

Leaders feel their careers are made or broken on the key decisions they make, but in reality, leaders are judged by the overall performance of their team, group, company or squad. Having the team's approval and loyalty is far more important than any individual decision, good or bad. After all, it is possible to make a bad call and have the skill of your team pull you out of trouble. With a weak team, even the right call might not work out.

Authenticity is powerful. So is compassion.

Having a team with a high value-set and strong intrinsic motivations (a shared mental model around delivering on the company's mission, for example) makes the leader's job easier. Teams are more inspired by your authenticity as a leader when you admit you got a call wrong. If you as a leader encourage your expert team to bring their whole selves to work and facilitate their psychological safety by creating an environment where creativity is not restricted by fear of failure, then the team will extend that same compassion to your mistakes.

The value of mistakes

Not only are mistakes vital to the creative and innovative processes, but they can also reveal important areas for process improvement. Mistakes are often indicators of missing insight, poorly designed processes, or a lack of connection between theory and practice. Mistakes can even be vital indicators that a project is important or meaningful, meaning that this work is far from routine.

In other words, mistakes can bring insight, ignite creativity, and help drive progress. As engines for innovation, they should be celebrated. Of course, mistakes should also be minimised in their scale, and each mistake should not be repeated; however, new mistakes, well-controlled and contained, are part of a leader's journey towards improvement.

Leaders don't need to be right all the time. They need to be authentic, clear-sighted, and to make decisions in the interests of the business.